i know it's already fall

I'm still a little bit holding on to summer. This was a big one for us. It was lovely and hard and I think all of us grew by leaps and bounds.

Sometimes I think older siblings get a little eclipsed when there's a new little one. Maybe not eclipsed entirely, but a lot of their identity gets funneled into being an older brother or sister. There are so many "how do you like having a baby in the house?" "how do you like being an older brother" questions - which are good and important and necessary, but it doesn't leave a lot of room for everything else.

I want to always remember that this was the summer Guthrie taught herself to read and became comfortable reading aloud to other people - not just her brother, though that was such an important step. She slowly, sometimes painfully, makes her way through short chapter books these days and almost always happily reads Laithe whatever he brings her. Bedtime usually ends with me reading a chapter from a longer book to both kids and then spending a few minutes cuddling after lights out. These days though she waits until Laithe is asleep and then requests to read one or two more books to herself. I feel like Marnie in Little Women when I kiss her head and admonish that she not stay up too late.

This was also the summer she started to really think outside of herself. She's always been so sensitive and empathetic to others, but she has this new desire to help others and to see needs that could be met. Many evenings she will ask if she can do anything to help me. This has also been the summer of needing privacy, needing some time alone to recharge and be inside her own head. She's spent hours drawing in her notebooks and I watch how sometimes the transition away from whatever is going on in her mind is difficult. I'll admit it's a little frustrating sometimes, but oh I remember those days! When I was so involved in my play that I stepping out if it was just the worst! She spends time quietly on the porch with her pocket knife sharpening sticks and I want to guard that time and space for her.

For Laithe I will remember how much he changed physically. Gone is my tiny boy with baby chub still hanging around. He lengthened and stretched until it's easier to see a six pack than a belly. He's always been so intensely physical and this summer was all about football and dancing and rough and tumble. His first trip to the ER for staples in his head (just a few, after a tumble down our top flight of stairs) and I steel myself that it will likely be the first of a few if he's anything like his father. He's intentional with his movements, but I've noticed that in the right environment he'll perceive the risk and then run towards it with all his might. Last summer with his mop of blond hair he reminded me so much of Dennis the Menace, but this year he's full on Peter Pan with an impishness I'm discovering is a personality trait as much as it is his age. Oh he makes us laugh! He tells terrible jokes!

I always knew he loved music, but I guess I didn't realize that there is a constant stream of song in his head. This summer there was so much singing! I occasionally sneak videos of him singing while involved in another activity. I love it.

Though she needs a break from him, Laithe has such a strong desire to be with his sister. She's as much his sidekick as he is hers. I worry sometimes about him carving out an identity separate from her, but he's got years and years to do that. In the past couple months I have also watched him start to really play with other kids, not just next to them. He's beginning to engage with some of our homeschool friends instead of just sitting by them while everyone does their own thing. He comes home from park dates with stories of shenanigans I didn't even realize were happening which makes me very happy for him -- even when they do involve decaying animals!

Both kids have become so independent. I find myself doing the dance that all parents do - to not hover, to let them go out of my sight at the park (within family rules), to help me in the kitchen with real tools and dangerous objects. Some days it's tough, but honestly most days it's a relief and a joy to watch them move comfortably outside arms length.

I have amazing kids. They are such a gift. And I'm so honored to be their mother! For sure it was a summer to remember.

Variations on a Theme

I was picking up and packing up some of the kids' artwork to give us a nice empty space to fill up again with school starting this week. My friend Sierra is really good about taking pictures of her kids' art and posting it on her blog and I keep telling myself I should do that. Really, what I want to do is be good about scanning it in to the computer and eventually creating photo books of their art, but yeah.

I'm pretty proud of myself for remembering to snap a few pictures this time!
I could say I'm super thrilled with both kids' fine motor skills development this summer. With Laithe beginning to write--- again without encouragement because when mama encourages it's over --- but really I'm just interested in their art. I always ask them to tell me about their picture and try to refrain from just saying "what is that?" because that's always kind of crushing isn't it? So these are their descriptions.

girl in fancy dress on the grass. {guthrie}

camping with Tegra. {guthrie}

mom at the beach. {guthrie}

girl on a pier. {guthrie}

all of us at a hotel. we have a force field around us to protect us from the volcano (left background) {laithe}

my hotel and a volcano exploding. {laithe}

my hotel on the beach. by the volcano. it's exploding. {laithe}

"oh hey Laithe! Is that the 5 of us camping? Is that our tent?" "Uh no, it's a volcano. We're running." {laithe}

little reader

Last week I fixed a snack for the kids and then left the room.

I came back to find Guthrie with her book set up so she could read while she ate.


Be still my mama heart!

It's not that this journey to reading has been particularly difficult in the grand scheme of things because really it hasn't. Frustrating? Most definitely. Have there been some painful moments? Uh yeah. Tears? A few. On both our parts. 

Guthrie seems to be a bit of a perfectionist. Which is neither good or bad, but it makes trying new things difficult. Sometimes she seems paralyzed by the fear of failing. It just wasn't what I expected from her. The other thing was that I expected that there would be this moment where a light somewhere would go on and she would get it. The light has been more like a steady small flame and there were no moments where the clouds parted and angels sang. This has just been a steady plod forward - and sometimes backwards. There's still not a huge amount of confidence on her part and she still balks at reading aloud and fusses when I choose something for her to read, but whatever, she's doing an excellent job and I couldn't be more proud of her. Even when I'm frustrated. 

Every kid has their gateway books, the ones that really, really help and the ones that they'll read on their own. Ours have been the Level One BOB set and then anything by Cynthia Rylant, but especially the Mr. Putter and Tabby books and Annie and Snowball. They're just sweet little books - and they have plot! Unlike the BOB books, but those were really, really useful for building confidence. 

I have loved watching her learn to read though. I am so glad that we didn't force it any earlier - this has been the perfect timing for her. 

Here's to many more times of finding her at the table with her nose buried in a book- even if it drives me crazy someday!