A Girl Named Gus

marry vs. mary

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 22:18:00 +0000

So, there's some confusion in our house.

I made an offhand comment to Guthrie awhile ago that her mom and dad are married. This was actually met with tears. Yeah, I don't know either. "NO, NO Mama and Daddy Married. NO!!" (Guthrie you are so weird sometimes) I've brought it up a couple times since and pointed out various signs of us being married- rings, photos, the tiara/veil thing I wore at our wedding which has since become the crown you are supposed to wear when you vacuum so that you look like a princess. Which, remind me to tell you about the princess thing later. These latter conversations have been met with a more resigned affect.

*****
Incidentally, I think I know where she gets this from, this whole, oh my gosh you're introducing a new concept to me about my family and I must deny it and cry. I distinctly remember the day my mom had to go to the courthouse in order to change political parties. I was probably a little older than Guthrie and I just knew she was going to go to jail for becoming a democrat.
*****

So a couple weeks ago we were setting out our nativities- we have several sets- and I asked her if she knew who these people were, etc, etc. and so we had a little lesson. As any three year old would she thought it totally rocked that Mary had a baby in a barn with the donkey there. Guthrie has a special affinity for donkeys. Once one came over and sniffed her face and pressed it's furry side against her in a little donkey hug when she was crying at the petting zoo. Probably after she found out I was also a democrat. Ever since then she's been pretty loyal.

However, a couple days later I'm listening to her talk about her life to the nativities and notice that there's been a breakdown somewhere.

Somewhere along the line because John and I are married and Mary's name is Mary I am obviously Mary and so going to have a baby in a barn. With a donkey undoubtedly. We've been having to play "marry/Mary" this weekend (which involves putting a blanket on your head - is this a veil? is this a representation of the traditional dress of 3 B.C? what is going on??) and dancing.

Now, 1. I don't think I need to 'fix' this problem. When she fails a spelling test because of it we can talk. And 2. I don't even know how to address it. Can you just hear me? So, Guthrie let's talk about the English language. . .

So, in the meantime, I guess wish me and the donkey luck?

***
Oh I almost forgot. The princess thing. Guthrie hasn't gotten into princesses yet. We are more than ok with that. Except now we have magi, err, princesses, all over our house. I get the logic. Long robes, crowns, slightly feminine renderings of men with wistful expressions. The only crown we have in our house is the tiara thing I wore at our wedding. I know you know where this is going. Guess who gets to play magi/princess? While vacuuming. Everyone needs to wear a crown while they use the purple dyson. Obviously.

These nativities- they cause mass confusion I tell you. Mass Confusion.

i know, i know

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 10:40:00 +0000

I've already been made fun of several times this week at work because I'm that weirdo weather lady. But, what's a 7 month pregnant woman to do besides read dramatic weather reports and get excited by them? Clean my bathroom again? I think not.

So the weather service issued a 'historical perspective' statement this morning - how awesome is that? and I'm totally going to republish it here for your enjoyment:
IT HAS BEEN ABOUT 10 YEARS SINCE SNOWS AND WINDS OF THIS MAGNITUDE AND EXPANSE HAVE BEEN SEEN ACROSS THE AREA. STORM STRENGTH IS ANOTHER MATTER. IT HAS PROBABLY BEEN 20 TO 30 YEARS SINCE THE IMPACTS OF A WINTER STORM OF THIS STRENGTH HAVE BEEN SEEN IN THE AREA.

My favorite line is "STORM STRENGTH IS ANOTHER MATTER."
And is this not the best doom and gloom paragraph you've ever had to read in a yelling Chris Matthews kind of voice? I mean it is in all caps for goodness sake.

So, yes, we'll be out and about today and probably not tomorrow as I'm kind of counting on Guthrie having her first real Snow Day on my scheduled day off. And it would be a fun snow day except for the blizzard possibilities, so in reality it'll be a fun movie day.

*****

In other news my friend Christie and I have tickets this Friday to see Birth the play at the Harrison Hilltop Theater. We're excited albeit a little nervous that we'll be the two people fighting to stay awake - not at all as a reflection of the play, but because we're old. And we're moms. And 8 pm on a Friday usually includes pajamas.
However I'm super excited because 1. I haven't been out with Christie sans family, umm, ever and we've been planning to have mom time for ages and 2. way excited for the play. I went to the Birth on Labor Day Event in 2007 in Iowa City and it was amazing!

snow!

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 13:01:00 +0000

and no camera!!

ugh. totally forgot to plug in my camera last night to charge the batteries.
Guthrie is still asleep but I cannot wait to wake her up and show her our little bit of snow!

best parenting ever.

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 03:35:00 +0000

'Guthrie, if you don't start cleaning up your toys RIGHT NOW I swear I'm going to vacuum them up. And then they will be stuck in the Dyson and you won't be able to play with them ever again. You'll only be able to look at them.'

Because I totally think that my Dyson could pick up an entire domino set, some marbles and the Little People school bus.

*****
I will admit my heart softened a little when she started counting her dominoes as she put them away -- in Spanish.

****

also it's snowing a little bit on and off today. does my heart good :)

possibly the last really nice day of the year

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 00:34:00 +0000

necessitated a trip to the park

with no coats -- mostly so mom could push up her sleeves to get some extra Vitamin D*last little bits of fall are everywhere
such concentration.

and with that, i'm ready for snow. any day now. in fact I'm getting the slightest bit antsy because we usually have a decent amount within a couple days of Thanksgiving, but not this year.

*because apparently, according to my labs,
I'm going to be
the first adult with a healthy,
varied diet to get rickets.
i know, what the heck?
i've gone from the recommended daily
dose of 400 IU to 6000.
Vitamin D gives me heartburn.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 01:33:00 +0000

I know you guys all know this, but it probably bears repeating -- Thanksgiving is my most favorite holiday. Ever.

Seriously.

I think it's partially the time of year. Partially the food. Partially the non-commercialism. Mostly the family and being with them. I just love being able to think about what I'm most grateful for all day- even when the turkey doesn't cook or the cranberry sauce explodes out of the blender never to be completely cleaned up until moving away from that particular apartment.

This year I'm just so thankful. Possibly the most I've ever been. I feel happier at this moment in my life than I think I ever have. Which is not uncommon for me to think, so I guess things have overall been pretty good. Never all roses and candy, but solidly Good for awhile now.

We were sitting down for dinner with Dietah and Ami (the two in-town grandmas) and we went around the table saying what we were most thankful for. It was pretty similar gratitude around the table, but Guthrie's was the best. Shocking I know. I asked 'what are you thankful for Guthrie?' as she spoons into her cranberry jello salad (which is shockingly awesome) and we fully expected an answer like 'ice cream, or my classroom or pumpkin pie' and instead were treated to "Mom, Dad, and Baby."

Yep took me a minute to not cry.

And so, the annual list of things I'm most thankful for right now:

Of course my family. John and Guthrie you are the most amazing people I could ever have the pleasure of knowing. Or loving.
And then there's the extended family who we miss more than we see and think of more than we talk to, but they all hold a special place in my heart.
My friends old and new.
This growing baby in my belly. Aside from being a new and already loved addition to our family it is keeping me so grounded. And ever Present in the moment. Aware of the world in a different way. I love being pregnant something fierce. Even when I can't get off the floor without help.
I'm so thankful for our house. I know we would be happy wherever we are, etc etc, but this house has become a part of me that I didn't know it would. It's become Home I guess.
I also love that being pregnant this time around seems to mean I'm surrounded by wise, wise women who are crazy supportive and kind. How lucky can one girl be? To have so many people checking in on 'us' and making sure we're ok - both physically and emotionally. The midwives I get to work with are a continual well of knowledge, empathy, calm, and compassion. And whenever I leave an appointment I feel more calm than when I got there. It seems they're somehow able to imprint their stillness on me. I'm so thankful.

And right now I'm also pretty darn thankful that my fridge is full of leftovers meaning we're gonna eat good for the next few days -- until another turkey sandwich sounds like the worst idea ever.

So, happy Thanksgiving to you all!

totally not invited

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 04:01:00 +0000

yeah, i was not at all invited to this party.

two things:
1. there have been a number of dad and guthrie parties that i have not been invited to and while i'm kind of sad i am also cognizant that this might be excellent timing and

2. guthrie has discovered letters. rather that letters represent words. is that not amazing?
we went to JoAnn's the other day which is in a strip mall. all the names of the stores are in big capital letters up above the stores. as we park i hear her identifying the letters that go with her classmates' names - "luh luh luh, _______ insert child's name starting with L here". i say, good, do you see any other letters? and she says MOM, LETTERS EVERYWHERE!!! I'm reminded of when I learned how to read and we drove down the main drag in Bend, Oregon - where we lived until I was 8- all of a sudden able to identify what I was seeing not just from memory but because I could actually read the signs.

parenthood is awesome.

so proud cont'd

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 02:07:00 +0000

just in case you can't read that tiny print :)

dancin with daddy

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 02:05:00 +0000

hooray!!

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 17:06:00 +0000

It's time for my yearly purchase of pop up sponges from Williams-Sonoma which will serve two purposes. One, the sponges are uh-mazing and two I will get the holiday catalogs from W-S to drool over before they figure out sometime early next spring that I actually don't ever order anything from them and so they are wasting their money sending me catalogs.

They are surprisingly on top of things - unlike say, Pottery Barn where I haven't placed an order for about 5 years and they still send me a ton of catalogs.

Did I mention that the sponges are awesome? They last for forever - and you can run them through the dishwasher to get the funk out along with microwaving them for disinfecting purposes. I tried some other pop ups when I should have placed an ill-timed W-S order (who cares about the summer catalog??) but got some at the Co-op in Iowa City and they were a sad state of affairs.

So Proud

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 04:28:00 +0000

So, John applied for this little grant a few months ago and now:

Breaking News from Bettendorf Library
and
QC Online!

Hopefully tonight there will be a picture with an oversized a la publishers clearinghouse check. I bet when it's that large it's supposed to be cheque, huh?

We are so proud of you!!!
love darah & gus & baby

WIP Wednesday

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 03:42:00 +0000

We are still recovering from the big birthday weekend and so the birthday blog post will have to wait. Instead, today Guthrie and I had a very nice lowkey day of doing not much. I like it when I get an actual Wednesday off.

Guthrie's birthday kind of marks the beginning of the holiday season for our family. The birthday, three weeks later Thanksgiving, three weeks later John's birthday, 10 days later Christmas and then, if we've made it this far then we should just go ahead and celebrate New Years, after which it'll be about 6 or so weeks until our new addition arrives. To be on the safe side let's say 4 - 8 weeks. I can tell people are so frustrated when I say I'm due in 'February' when they're looking for an actual date, but really I'm not so worried about the date so it takes a minute for me to remember. On a busy day 'mid-February' is the best they're going to get.

So, we've got a doosie of a Season here this year. I think I'm gearing you up for the blogging being spotty for awhile. I can feel myself starting to slow down and after Guthrie's birthday I noticed was tired in a way I haven't been for quite awhile. And even though I'm exhausted I've gotten to that point in pregnancy where my hands are just itching to be busy with small projects. Good thing it's the Season :)

So one of the things that has been on my list for awhile is labeling Guthrie's winter stuff so she doesn't come home with random gloves or loses a hat. I got a roll of twill tape from the fabric store and a permanent fabric marker and wrote her last name 8,000 times on it. I'll sew the labels on the backs or insides of her stuff. As a bonus it'll create a little tag for her to use when she's hanging up stuff on hooks as apparently manufacturers of children's coats don't often think of such things. Except Hanna Anderson. We heart you Hanna Anderson - with your pre-made name label and sturdy coat hanger on the collar!!

Picked up some new yarn when I needed a break from work the other day. It'll turn into some Christmas presents for three little girls soon I think.

And always more yarn - a promised 'before the first snow, well, real snow' hat for John.

While I was taking pictures of this stuff our newest little photographer got on the bandwagon. She's so serious and has become quite the documentarian - demanding pictures of dinner before it gets eaten, coats before they are put on, lots and lots of daily life shots of mom and dad.

And finally my belly as a work in progress. It's growing folks. By leaps and bounds. The girls at work are eyeing me with that, man she is going to get BIG look. And I eye them back and think, duh. So I'm about 25 weeks and at this point last time I was still looking like a toss up between being pregnant or having eaten a large pizza and an entire 6 pack for lunch.
I'm thinking it's pretty clear this time it's not pizza. I'm pretty thrilled that I'm still wearing my wedding rings with no problem- I think that has a lot to do with the weather though too. And really, overall I feel really good. I'm trying to relish this relatively comfortable phase of pregnancy. Some days it's easier than others. I'm frequently heard saying, 'ugh I need to stretch my hips, they're so sore' and John's frequently heard singing a stellar rendition of Shakira's My Hips Don't Lie.

Good times at our house :)

Happy Birthday

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 00:18:00 +0000

to our beautiful 3 year old girl.

Our lives are so much, well, they are just so much More with you in them!

We love you so very, very much!

mom & dad

our week -- so far

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 04:15:00 +0000

pumpkin patching
pumpkin carving
being crabby
being excited about an upcoming birthday
seeing emma and sierra for some early birthday celebrations as they share the same big day and have never been together on it --
except when they were born down the hall from each other
lots of preparing for Halloween and Birthday fun!

it's been quite a week - and it's only Wednesday!!

and yes, we've all got this glazed look about us tonight.

Happy Birthday Uncle Andrew!!!

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 00:33:00 +0000

It's Guthrie's beloved Uncle Andrew's birthday.

She's been singing 'Hap a Bir Day to you Ando' for at least the past hour.

And then she bows.

Andrew, she would also like to know if you have blown out your candles yet and if you made a wish?

I was trying to find some recent pictures of Guthrie and Uncle Andrew, but it seems we are remiss in documenting the two of them. We'll need to fix that.

Andrew's been around since the beginning of Guthrie. John met him very early on in school in Iowa, like maybe the first day. And I bet Andrew never thought that he would become our future kids' uncle when he met me and my first words to him were, "sorry our car smells like cat ass". (they'd just traveled across the country in that particular car and so really, my statement was no embellishment.) A few months later though Andrew was a welcome permanent fixture at our house - he lived across the street so it was easy- and when we told him we were going to have a baby, well, it was great how excited he was. (and between us, john said it sounded like he was so excited he got a little choked up about baby #2)

And so, here we are what, 4 years later? and Guthrie loves herself some Uncle Andrew.
Like adores Uncle Andrew. If we say he's coming to visit this weekend she'll talk about it nonstop all week. And then, when he gets here she has to sit as close to him as possible for at least the first hour. After the first hour it's ok to play near him, but it's better to always be able to have a hand on his arm. He's been a part of so many of her Firsts. Like first day of life, first steps, first fire in the kitchen on Superbowl Sunday. Definitely first french fries.

Really, we couldn't have chosen a better adopted uncle for our kids if we'd picked one out at free uncle day. He's so patient and caring and I think he'll always be a safe person for our kids to talk to when they're not so interested in talking to their parents. It's a safe bet he'll always be interested in what they're interested in and always willing to sit on the floor and play. I think he'll teach them about living honestly and having integrity and possibly some Elvish. And let's face it, between John and Andrew our family is in for more than their fair share of Star Wars and Zelda. Whatever, as long as Andrew will always watch Bravo and Project Runway marathons with me I'm a happy camper. I'm excited to see our kids grow up knowing Andrew and the wonderful person he is.

Uhh, and apparently the pregnancy hormones are getting a little out of hand because I'm getting misty eyed. Geez.
So, before I need to go have a Moment, just wanted to say Happy Birthday Andrew! We love you so much and we're so grateful to have you in our lives!

and the award goes to . . .

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 00:33:00 +0000

the best dressed girl in preschool in the "I dress myself" category

look how proud she is!

it's funny to see other parents' reactions because they're usually a combination of - oh my gosh she's so cute and oh my gosh you are so brave and must not actually be her mother because I would NEVER let my kid out of the house looking like that.

my wild things

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 11:11:00 +0000

I didn't post my WIP on Wednesday well, because I got too busy working! So, here's a little before and after.

We're way excited about the Where the Wild Things Are movie coming out. I love this book and it's shaping up that Guthrie loves it too - requesting it to be read a couple of times a week at least.

So, when we saw these super cute Max hats well, we bought ourselves some fleece. I ended up making Gus another, bigger hat than the one you see here and it sewed up really quickly and doing some adjustments on John's. Amazing how fast things go when you don't have a mini-me sewing with you. I taught her how to cut thread on the little thread cutter on the side of the machine and our house is littered with small bits of thread. She was in heaven.

So, tonight John and I are going to go see the movie. I told everyone just we were going because I wanted to make sure it was good for an almost 3 year old before I pay for her ticket, however, it's really because I want to actually watch the movie and not go to the bathroom 85 times and field emotional upsets about popcorn fingers. Because sometimes that's how movies work with us. I'm pretty sure we'll be going early next week with Guthrie in tow.

Did you know my family has so many teeth? because I certainly didn't!

happy 1st snowfall!!!

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 16:15:00 +0000

I woke up early this morning with a huge burst of energy. My inner voice said 'dude, take advantage of this one. get going on that Halloween costume.' So I started working on it and Guthrie started playing her new favorite thing - Wii Fit. John bought it for me this week and I was so excited and it has been completely taken over by our apparent exercise fiend. It doesn't help that it's so much fun!

I was about to say, ok one more game and that's it when I looked up and outside and lo and behold SNOW!!! Are you kidding me?
It's the 10th of October.

Never in my life . . .

Just a few beautiful flakes that look so incongruous with our still green grass and barely turning yellow leaves.

Of course we had to go play.
In our pjs and winter accessories. (Good thing I got those out this week!)
Guthrie is SO excited. I can't imagine the level of thrill when she wakes up to it actually having covered the ground.

Forget the Halloween decorations I was planning on making with Guthrie this afternoon! I want to make snowflakes! But, that's kind of mostly ridiculous.

Also we told Guthrie back in umm, May that she couldn't watch A Christmas Story until it at least snowed.
Guess what she asked for as soon as we came inside?

Yeah, I'll never give that as a timeline again!

And we're suddenly unsure about going apple picking this afternoon. Either way, we'll probably remember this first snowfall for a long time! The baby seems to be super excited today too. There's been steady movement since I woke up with a huge amount of kicking while we were outside and Guthrie was screaming about the snow. When I was pregnant with Guthrie I could not wait until the weather turned cooler because that meant that Guthrie would be born soon. This time I've been significantly less impatient, but in my head I've been waiting for the snow to begin to welcome our winter baby. I had no idea the welcoming process would start so early!!

little convo

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 00:50:00 +0000

So, here's a little conversation Guthrie and I had tonight:

We're in the computer room before going to fold a massive amount of laundry and Gus picks a picture of my college graduation up.

"Mommy, who that?"
"That's mom's friend, your Aunt Kathy."
"What?"
"You know Kathy - the one who got you your blue owl shirt?" (note: it's important to differentiate between owl shirts. the blue one, the brown one, the pink one, none to confused with the purple owl pajamas. girl's got a thing for owls)
"Oh, yes. Mommy friend Kathy."
"And this Mommy?"
"Yep, that's Mom."

*silence for awhile*

"Where Guthrie?"
"Well, it was 2001, so you weren't born for a long time yet."

*eyes fill with tears and eyebrows get very pointy. the more pointy the eyebrows the more concerned.*

"Honey, it's ok."

*more silence*

And with utter confidence:

"No, Guthrie in Mommy's tummy here."

Apparently I gestate for years. 5.5 years to be exact.

and here are the eyebrows for your viewing pleasure.

WIP Wednesday

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 15:07:00 +0000

In an effort to keep me going - rather keep both my blogging and priorities going at the same time- I'm getting on the WIP Wednesday band wagon. And my, it is quite the band wagon. Google it sometime "WIP Wednesday" It's kind of inspirational to see all these people working on different things all at the same time. Does my creative heart good to know all that's out there.

So what am I working on this Wednesday? A little bit of work that doesn't need to be photographed (HIPAA and all) and then some projects.

It's officially feeling like fall here. This little yarn apple project has made it's way all over the internet. I think I'll make a few more just because they're so fun.

And then there's the crocheting. All of it will be gifts, so no further info :)

And finally there's this little work in progress which isn't so little anymore.

Sorry for the weird angle - I couldn't figure out how to do a timed self-portrait and focus simultaneously. But, yes, the bump seems to be getting bigger. And busy. It's a busy bump. I thought Guthrie was odd in that she was so active in my belly, but apparently I just have active kids. Active enough that that whole, measure how many times your baby moves in 2 hours is kind of a joke. I'm hoping that within the next week or so John and Gus will both be able to feel it move. And, no, I cannot see my feet without some effort. I know you were wondering.

This week marks the halfway point. I'm both excited about that and freaked out. Time has gone by so quickly. I'm taking a Mindful Birthing class in Iowa City for the next month or so. The focus is on education, self-hypnosis, and yoga. In theory we get an hour of each during the class. John went last week because it was birth positions and labor support week. It was nice to have him there and it got us back into the swing of thinking about this impending labor and birth. And we discovered that I can squat like a champ. Yay yoga!
I also enjoy going alone as it gives me some time to focus on this pregnancy and this baby.
I'm glad it's getting toward fall and then winter as I always find myself turning inward and having more time to spend on doing what I love.

Hope your Wednesday is going wonderfully!

painting

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 03:24:00 +0000

i love the intense focus of an almost 3 year old.

all things preschool

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 15:48:00 +0000

Three days down and two to go and we'll have completed the first week of preschool!

Here are the awaited front stoop pictures. Such a right of passage those obligatory- stand on the steps and don't move!- photos. I have a suspicion that the look of excitement kind of peaked this year. I also have a suspicion that I will try to remember to at least pick up the front porch before next year but that I probably won't.She is very proud of her outfit and has been tearfully disappointed that she's not been able to wear the pink dress every day this week. Which, actually she thinks is just a really long shirt. We let her pick out everything for the day. In her backpack are Rar and Meow her school support system. Up to this point she's never really had a transitional object- you know, a blanket, a pacifier, a stuffed animal, something to keep something about her situation the same. About a month ago though Rar the tiger started making appearances more often. So, off to school he goes.

We had let her know the schedule for the morning several times over the weekend and she was still surprised and horrified when I said goodbye to her. There were many, many tears and her teacher finally pulled her into her arms and I walked out the door. They said she was fine after a little bit.

The second day was a little better. John was with me and he's a little more able to walk away than I am. I had to go stand out by the car.

The third day, this morning, was much better. I'm not sure if it was the promise (read: bribe) of a surprise after school if there were no tears or if she's just getting more used to it. Probably both.
Every day though upon pick up she's been thrilled and full of excitement about her day. My mom commented, after watching her yesterday afternoon, that she already seems to be talking more and I wonder if it's that she's got so much more to talk about. Her very own experiences.

Every day they send home a folder with communication and stuff in it and yesterday we got our first preschool pictures. A beetle and a stoplight. Guthrie has a special place in her heart for stop signs and stoplights. I was thrilled to get the pictures though. Again, such a right of passage.

And such a call for some sort of organizational tool!!

I know you're wondering how we did as the parents. John did good I think. Sad, but good. I however was a stinking mess. Like way more than Guthrie. I'm sure it's partly the head cold and pregnancy hormones along with my baby growing up.

I teared up (at minimum) at the following times:
- helping her get dressed
- before breakfast
- taking pictures
- driving into the school parking lot
- leaving Guthrie (duh)
- driving out of the parking lot
- driving to the coffee shop to meet my mom
- in the coffee shop bathroom
- in the actual coffee shop
- on the way home after coffee
- random times throughout the morning
- and finally when I got there a little early to pick her up and she didn't see me and watching her so carefully watch the other kids and listen to what her teacher was telling the class to do.

Told you - total mess.
Kathleen you're next. And Melissa I can't believe Zoe is starting Kindergarten next week.
I hope you survive a little better than I did :)

big day tomorrow

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 03:46:00 +0000

Yes, indeed.

Guthrie's First Day of School.
Ever.

The new dress that she picked out is washed and ready to go.
The backpack is packed, except for Rar the tiger.
The sausage patties are waiting for us in the fridge because Guthrie said, "Gus yike dis." I said, "Really? When did you have them?" "At Gus' house." Huh.

This is the new answer for everything. Apparently our house is home to many strange and parentally unknown activities. Like sausage patties.

And I completely can't sleep. I'm sure pregnancy will take over soon, but for now I'm awake.

What if she cries when I leave? Like really, truly cries? And will it be better if she just skips off without a backward glance?

This isn't just preschool for us, it's the first time she's ever been anywhere without a family member. The two times she's been babysat by friends I think she was too young to remember. So, I don't know. I'm all freaked out that somehow I've 'done her wrong' and should have exposed her to more babysitters or experiences without us. She's not even 3 years old yet though, so really how many experiences should she be having?

I was at a meeting with some co-workers last week and the one girl, with a son slightly younger than Gus, talked of leaving her son with her parents for monthly weekends beginning when he was 2 months old. She says it is the best thing for her marriage and for her son. And part of me wonders if I should be more like that, whatever 'that' is. But I'm not. As parents, John and I are just not like that. And I'm not judging her, please don't think that, because I know everyone in that situation is happy just like I know that everyone in this situation is happy. And that's good family life.

It just makes you reevaluate how you're doing things. You know? It didn't necessarily help that the other woman, after I said that John and I had not had a night away together since Gus has been born, said her and her husband hadn't either for several years and now they're divorced. She was quick to say, not that I think the same thing will happen to you! But the thought was obviously there on all our parts. I'm inclined to believe that divorce is complicated and while no weekends away might have been a symptom of the problem, it certainly wasn't the disease. I felt like I handled it ok and was happy to come home to find my husband and daughter napping together in what is, a majority of the time, still a family bed. And I was happy to join them and know that this stage won't last forever and I will cherish every second I can.

So, here's to new experiences and new friends and more independence on everyone's parts. I, for one, am looking forward to my weekly day off and a chunk of time to spend alone in the morning while Gus is at school. I think John is thinking the same for his Tuesday mornings. And I'm so looking forward to the things she is going to learn! How exciting!

One more thing and then I swear I will end the world's longest blog post not necessarily about preschool! We went to her classroom's open house last week and it was great. The classroom looked just like the kind of classroom I'd always wanted and could never have. And you know what it comes down to? Curriculum. How weird is that? In the curriculum I had to follow there were a certain number of things that had to be in the room at all times and within those certain things a specific number of items. Like blocks. 350 plain tan blocks of various sizes. 150 colored blocks of various sizes. Foam blocks. Wooden blocks. Plastic blocks.

I get the theory- provide enough choices for everyone and enough materials for multiple kids in a center. But it was chaos folks. Utter chaos. No one needs that many choices, let alone a 3 year old. My ability to focus in that classroom was nil - no wonder the kids had a hard time too.

Not so in Gus' new classroom. Simple shelves. Wooden toys. Clear boundaries and clear areas for specific tasks. Of course there's a big empty space for games and songs and creative play, but it's all just so manageable. I watched new kids come into my classroom for the first time and be completely overwhelmed. I watched all the new kids in Guthrie's classroom be able to navigate easily and focus on what interested them without getting distracted. When they were done they moved on. It was like watching a procession. I think I'm gonna like this Montessori thing. I might not agree with all of it, but I think the benefits will outweigh everything else. I'll let you know in a few months!

So, wish us luck. There will be pics tomorrow of course!

like little women, only better

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 23:29:00 +0000

Do you remember the scene in Little Women where they've dressed up the cat? In a bonnet? And the cat just sits there and loves it? I always hoped that our cats would be like that. I doubted that they would allow themselves to be pushed in a stroller, but I hoped they would be companions to our kids.

Guthrie and Lt. O'Riley have this kind of tenuous relationship. There is much love between them, but it's obvious that, well, you know how kids can get kind of grabby. Riley's not the most laid back cat. In fact he's kind of aggressive. Like pet me NOW. I will sleep between your legs NOW. I will take over most of the couch/bed/floor or wherever you are NOW. But it seems that him and Gus have made a sort of pact, like ok I really want attention and you'll give it to me, but I'll have to put up with some obnoxious stuff like you tickling your face with my tail even though you're sitting two feet away from me. Zoe pretty much has nothing to do with Gus, but she's the most relaxed cat so this whole thing surprises me.

So, as I'm sitting here checking my mail Guthrie is intensely focused on getting Riley to do what she wants, which right now is to wear a ribbon as a belt.

I get up and go downstairs and ask if she's coming with me and she said, 'No, working.' And she is working hard because the cat does not like to accessorize.

I think he's kind of smug that at 9 lbs she cannot lift him at all- especially if he makes himself floppy. Which I think is super funny because I remember her doing that very same thing to me about a year ago. Karma can be funny sometimes.

I come back upstairs and he is still laying here. It's been at least 10 minutes now with this belt thing which is a feat of concentration for both Guthrie and the cat.
Finally he gets fed up and needs to clean himself and really I cannot blame him. She does seem to create what John has deemed 'baby grease'.

This is definitely a new record though and I'm sorry to say this Riley, but I see bonnets in your future!

And now she tells me no, she cannot put on new underwear because she must go talk to Wiwey. I'd love to be privy to that conversation.

visual aids

darah7@gmail.com (darah) — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 20:46:00 +0000

So, yesterday we saw our baby.

It's lovely and perfect.

Ok maybe it looks a little like a T-Rex right now, but that's normal, right?

Last meeting with the midwife we didn't hear a heartbeat so she recommended that we come back in a week just to try again. And we didn't hear it again -- which happened with Guthrie too -- so she asked us if it was ok to send us to get an ultrasound as I'd also had some spotting over the weekend. I don't mean to sound cocky or anything, but instinctually I was pretty sure everything was ok; neither of us were all that worried going into it.

John got a much better view of everything as the tech did both an internal and external ultrasound for some reason. I got to see about 30 seconds of the external one and I think that's just because I asked and sounded fairly irritated. I realize they have a job to do and that it's an important job, but dude, that's my kid in there. You shouldn't get to see it without me getting to see it! I grew it for Pete's Sake.

John asked for a picture at the end so we could show Guthrie- we looked at ultrasound pics of her that I found in what is officially now the pregnancy journal and she just looked and looked and kept asking questions "dis, Dus* nose?", so we thought it'd be kind of cool for her to see this. But the tech said that, "there's not much to see right now, you're better off waiting for your next ultrasound." I think they don't do many prenatal ultrasounds at this hospital - they don't have a birthing unit or anything. John's all "I bet she doesn't have kids" when we left because if she did she'd know that at this point, a blob would makes us excited. We were disappointed, but at the same time watching John's face as he saw our child for the first time is something I'll always remember. I know he puts up with a lot when I'm pregnant - the word volatile comes to mind- but I love how this brings us closer.

Even though I'm not sure the ultrasound was necessary it was still so amazing to get a visual confirmation of what we already knew.

I'm down to 1 pair of work pants that I can button and 2 elastic waist skirts. Good thing I work four days a week and Fridays we can wear jeans! I give myself a couple more weeks of this and then I'll need to go shopping for work appropriate pants I think. I was able to wear jeans and cargos all the time last time but this time I have to be "business casual." I think this means no yoga pants. Bummer.

What I'm really worried about is underwear. I know. These are the important things, right? I'd say that 99% of women just shove their undies down under their belly once it really starts to grow. Which was fine last time, but this time I'll have a somewhat sensitive scar to contend with down there. For now it's ok, but rumor has it that it'll start to grow and stretch and itch and ache and there may be some popping sensations.

Sounds fun, huh?
Kind of like Aliens?

So. . . does this mean maternity underwear??? Yikes. I had a couple pairs last time for afterwards and they're gigantic. Like they go for yards and yards above my pants.

These are the things that keep me up at night.

*Also Guthrie now calls herself Dus. At bedtime the other night- which remind me to post about bedtime because I'm loving it right now and I know I won't always love it so I should write it down so I can read it later! Anyways. At bedtime the other night we were talking about school and I asked her if she would like her new friends to call her Gus or Guthrie. After pondering for awhile she said Guthrie! For the first time!! It was awesome. And she hasn't said it ever again.